Pamatay na Banat sa Ex at Karibal
*after breaking up with my bf, he wanted us to get back again... i told him "ligawan mo ako ulit"...
then he goes, "sasagutin mo ba ako?"
syempre sagot ko, "hindi"
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
* para sa mga third parties...
"don't hate me coz i'm beautiful..hate me coz your boyfriend thinks so..."
* well.. para doon sa ex na pinamamalita ang nangyari sa relationships ninyo!
" Im never satisfied anyway!"![rolleyes rolleyes](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/001_rolleyes.gif)
![rolleyes rolleyes](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/001_rolleyes.gif)
* IN SENIOR HIGH, THERE'S THIS GIRL WHO LIKED THIS GUY WHO ENDED UP TO BE MY BOYFRIEND. SO NILAIT-LAIT AKO NUNG GIRL. WELL, SORRY AKO, MAGANDA TALAGA SIYA. BUT I GOT THE GUY SO I KEPT QUIET KASO, MAKULIT TALGA EH. SO I SAID:
"ALAM MO, TALAGANG MAS MAGANDA KA SA KIN EH. MATALINO KA PA. ANO KAYANG NAPAKALAKING MALI SA 'YO? KASI AYAW KA TALAGA NIYA EH."![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* HIRIT NG SISTER KO SA GIRL NA EPAL SA LOVELIFE NIYA:
" SA 'YO NA. MAS KELANGAN MO YATA YAN EH. AKO MAKAKAHANAP PA NG IBA."
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
* BF nanloko..
ex: i just need time to change.
GiRL: you don't need time, you need a miracle.
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
* ex: this is my new gf (pinakita yung picture).
me: kala ko maid nyo.
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
* To an ex boyfriend who said sh*t about me:
"Five minutes of kissing him doesn't compare to three hours of f*ck*n you. Besides, every orgasm I had with you was F-A-K-E!"
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
* kung masasalubong ko ex ko with her new BF:
"Wow, bagay nga kayo... (turo sa ex) Basura... (turo sa BF niya) Basurero..."
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
*karibal:grabe kang magsalita..hay naku, i wonder kung san ka na namang basura pinulot ni *o**(hubby ko)...
me: at least nga ako, kahit galing sa basura, pinulot pa..eh ikaw, nanggaling ka nga sa ganyan kaso may pumulot na ba sayo?
![big grin](http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/4.gif)
![big grin](http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/4.gif)
* To an ex begging to be taken back:
"Sorry, I don't recycle."
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
*ex: ganyan na pala gumaganda, nagiging suplada
me: of course, may taste na ako ngayon!
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
*eto yung sa kaibigan ko nung nalaman nya na may nililigawan yung bf nya na gusto nyang hiwalayan. nagyari pa to sa isang bar! heheheh
"You know what? Bagay kayo!
Isang BASURA AT ISANG BASURERA!"
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
* yung ex ng BF ko eh nanggugulo sa text ...
EX: go to hell!
ME: see you there!
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* to an ex bf: everyone told me na lugi ako sa iyo, but i ignored all of them kasi mahal kita. pero ngayon sinasabi ko na sa mukha mo. itsura, pera, ugali lugi ako sa relationship natin dahil panget ka na masama pa ugali mo.
![great great](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/great.gif)
![great great](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/great.gif)
* my bf that time was cheating on me... i saw the girl... i said to him
"pagpalit mo lang ako sa gremlin pa? lintik ka! "
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
* kerida to real wife...
(wife inaaway ang kerida)
kerida: alam mo masyado kang KSP. wala ka na bang ibang makausap dyan sa inyo? sa totoo lang pinagttyagaan lang kita naaawa kasi ako sayo. at wag mong masyadong ubusin oras mo kakaisip sakin, baka mabaliw ka nyan. kung wala kang magawa atupagin mo na lang ang anak mo. wag kang mag-alala inaatupag ko na asawa mo dito!
asawa: mas nakakaawa ka... ako legal na asawa eh ikaw ano ka?
kerida: legal na asawa ka nga kinamumuhian at itinataboy ka naman ng asawa mo. eh samantalang ako alagang-alaga ako ng asawa mo. pera lang naman kayang ibigay sayo ng asawa mo dba? ano pang iba, wala na!
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
* naka away ko gf ng ex ko.di ko alam pinagsasabay kami. eh yung nagkaalaman na.. sabi ni girl
gf: mas bata ako sa iyo. sa akin pa rin uuwi si michael!
ako: mas bata ka nga, mas senior citizen matronic naman ang beauty mo! at kahit sa iyo umuuwi si Michael..alam ko pangalan KO ang tinatawag niya kapag nag do DO kayo! kulang na lang lagyan niya ng unan ang ulo mo.
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
* girl nakita niya ex niya na may bagong dyowa...
"kayo na pala? mag-ingat ka ha kasi kapag nagsawa yan sa akin bumabalik yan...."
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
Banat sa Karibal
"Hanapin mo yung taong nakalaan para sayo.
Hindi yung pati akin, pinagkakaintere san mo...buset!"
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
EXCUSE ME KARIBAL !
DADAAN ANG ORIGINAL MAY
ANGAL ?? !! Letsye !?!?!
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* Banatan ng magkaribal
ex ng jowa ko: sabihin mo naman sa ex ko na magkita kami. hindi ko naman sya aagawin sayo eh.
me: kung gusto mo sayo na sya. kaso nagsawa na sya sa maitim mong kilikili at sa bangs mong pangbakla. pano ba yan?
ex ng jowa ko: ang kapal mo! nagustuhan ka lang nyan dahil iniwan ko sya!
me: iniwan mo pala eh bakit ka nagmamakaawang magkita kayo. pathetic ka ba?
ex ng jowa ko: babalikan din ako nyan! second option ka lang nya!
me: seryoso? gusto mo magpustahan pa tayo? so what kung second option nya ako basta hindi ako nagmumukhang pathetic gaya mo.
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
Huwag kang magtaka kung
maraming naghahabol sa Ex
mo. Ganyan talaga pagbasura,
nilalangaw.
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
Banat ni Girl sa Ex nya
" Oh akala ko ba allergic ka sa SEAFOODS
bakit ang jowa mo HIPON!?"
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
* ex-bf na gustong bumalik sayo dahil wala na sila nung gf nya:
"Sorry ha, pero di ako kumakain ng tira-tira na lang....."
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
*after breaking up with my bf, he wanted us to get back again... i told him "ligawan mo ako ulit"...
then he goes, "sasagutin mo ba ako?"
syempre sagot ko, "hindi"
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
* para sa mga third parties...
"don't hate me coz i'm beautiful..hate me coz your boyfriend thinks so..."
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
* well.. para doon sa ex na pinamamalita ang nangyari sa relationships ninyo!
" Im never satisfied anyway!"
![rolleyes rolleyes](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/001_rolleyes.gif)
![rolleyes rolleyes](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/001_rolleyes.gif)
* IN SENIOR HIGH, THERE'S THIS GIRL WHO LIKED THIS GUY WHO ENDED UP TO BE MY BOYFRIEND. SO NILAIT-LAIT AKO NUNG GIRL. WELL, SORRY AKO, MAGANDA TALAGA SIYA. BUT I GOT THE GUY SO I KEPT QUIET KASO, MAKULIT TALGA EH. SO I SAID:
"ALAM MO, TALAGANG MAS MAGANDA KA SA KIN EH. MATALINO KA PA. ANO KAYANG NAPAKALAKING MALI SA 'YO? KASI AYAW KA TALAGA NIYA EH."
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* HIRIT NG SISTER KO SA GIRL NA EPAL SA LOVELIFE NIYA:
" SA 'YO NA. MAS KELANGAN MO YATA YAN EH. AKO MAKAKAHANAP PA NG IBA."
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
* BF nanloko..
ex: i just need time to change.
GiRL: you don't need time, you need a miracle.
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
* ex: this is my new gf (pinakita yung picture).
me: kala ko maid nyo.
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
* To an ex boyfriend who said sh*t about me:
"Five minutes of kissing him doesn't compare to three hours of f*ck*n you. Besides, every orgasm I had with you was F-A-K-E!"
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
![naughty](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/naughty.gif)
* kung masasalubong ko ex ko with her new BF:
"Wow, bagay nga kayo... (turo sa ex) Basura... (turo sa BF niya) Basurero..."
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
*karibal:grabe kang magsalita..hay naku, i wonder kung san ka na namang basura pinulot ni *o**(hubby ko)...
me: at least nga ako, kahit galing sa basura, pinulot pa..eh ikaw, nanggaling ka nga sa ganyan kaso may pumulot na ba sayo?
![big grin](http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/4.gif)
![big grin](http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/4.gif)
* To an ex begging to be taken back:
"Sorry, I don't recycle."
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
*ex: ganyan na pala gumaganda, nagiging suplada
me: of course, may taste na ako ngayon!
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
*eto yung sa kaibigan ko nung nalaman nya na may nililigawan yung bf nya na gusto nyang hiwalayan. nagyari pa to sa isang bar! heheheh
"You know what? Bagay kayo!
Isang BASURA AT ISANG BASURERA!"
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
* yung ex ng BF ko eh nanggugulo sa text ...
EX: go to hell!
ME: see you there!
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* to an ex bf: everyone told me na lugi ako sa iyo, but i ignored all of them kasi mahal kita. pero ngayon sinasabi ko na sa mukha mo. itsura, pera, ugali lugi ako sa relationship natin dahil panget ka na masama pa ugali mo.
![great great](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/great.gif)
![great great](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/great.gif)
* my bf that time was cheating on me... i saw the girl... i said to him
"pagpalit mo lang ako sa gremlin pa? lintik ka! "
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
* kerida to real wife...
(wife inaaway ang kerida)
kerida: alam mo masyado kang KSP. wala ka na bang ibang makausap dyan sa inyo? sa totoo lang pinagttyagaan lang kita naaawa kasi ako sayo. at wag mong masyadong ubusin oras mo kakaisip sakin, baka mabaliw ka nyan. kung wala kang magawa atupagin mo na lang ang anak mo. wag kang mag-alala inaatupag ko na asawa mo dito!
asawa: mas nakakaawa ka... ako legal na asawa eh ikaw ano ka?
kerida: legal na asawa ka nga kinamumuhian at itinataboy ka naman ng asawa mo. eh samantalang ako alagang-alaga ako ng asawa mo. pera lang naman kayang ibigay sayo ng asawa mo dba? ano pang iba, wala na!
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
* naka away ko gf ng ex ko.di ko alam pinagsasabay kami. eh yung nagkaalaman na.. sabi ni girl
gf: mas bata ako sa iyo. sa akin pa rin uuwi si michael!
ako: mas bata ka nga, mas senior citizen matronic naman ang beauty mo! at kahit sa iyo umuuwi si Michael..alam ko pangalan KO ang tinatawag niya kapag nag do DO kayo! kulang na lang lagyan niya ng unan ang ulo mo.
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
![011 011](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/011.gif)
* girl nakita niya ex niya na may bagong dyowa...
"kayo na pala? mag-ingat ka ha kasi kapag nagsawa yan sa akin bumabalik yan...."
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
Banat sa Karibal
"Hanapin mo yung taong nakalaan para sayo.
Hindi yung pati akin, pinagkakaintere san mo...buset!"
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
![diablo diablo](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/diablo.gif)
EXCUSE ME KARIBAL !
DADAAN ANG ORIGINAL MAY
ANGAL ?? !! Letsye !?!?!
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
![Twisted Evil Twisted Evil](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/icon_twisted.gif)
* Banatan ng magkaribal
ex ng jowa ko: sabihin mo naman sa ex ko na magkita kami. hindi ko naman sya aagawin sayo eh.
me: kung gusto mo sayo na sya. kaso nagsawa na sya sa maitim mong kilikili at sa bangs mong pangbakla. pano ba yan?
ex ng jowa ko: ang kapal mo! nagustuhan ka lang nyan dahil iniwan ko sya!
me: iniwan mo pala eh bakit ka nagmamakaawang magkita kayo. pathetic ka ba?
ex ng jowa ko: babalikan din ako nyan! second option ka lang nya!
me: seryoso? gusto mo magpustahan pa tayo? so what kung second option nya ako basta hindi ako nagmumukhang pathetic gaya mo.
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
![005 005](http://traderspizza.com/images/smiles/005.gif)
Huwag kang magtaka kung
maraming naghahabol sa Ex
mo. Ganyan talaga pagbasura,
nilalangaw.
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
![glee](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/hihi.gif)
Banat ni Girl sa Ex nya
" Oh akala ko ba allergic ka sa SEAFOODS
bakit ang jowa mo HIPON!?"
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing](http://pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotfl.gif)
* ex-bf na gustong bumalik sayo dahil wala na sila nung gf nya:
"Sorry ha, pero di ako kumakain ng tira-tira na lang....."
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
![rolling on the floor laughing my a$$
off](http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/images/smilies/rotflmao.gif)
1 comments:
dabes!!