Pamatay na Pambasted

Pamatay na Pambasted




* He goes, "Hi I'm ________ "

And I shake his hand and say , "And I'm in a hurry."








* guy: pwede ba kitang maging kaibigan (dumidiskarte)
girl: i don't want you to be my friend
guy: bakit naman
girl: sorry...you don't meet my standards eh









* one time i had this super kulit suitor who'd like propose to me every other minute, exasperated i finally answered him:

"what part of NO did you not understand?!?!?!?!"










* banat ng mga babae sa manliligaw...
"Hindi tayo bagay kasi ako dyosa ikaw halimaw."










* pambasted sa kaibigang naliligaw:

"you're such a good friend why ruin our friendship"










* when a man approached me with a smile....
man:Hi miss...can i...
me:sorry....nagbigay na ako ng donation sa mga kasamahan mo...








* sungit banat 
man:miss...ahh...
me:gusto mo bang guamastos sa hospital ng super laki at ma coma ka pa?!ha?!ano?!sagot!










* A guy approched me.

guy: Hi. kilala kita db classmates tayo nung high school?
my friend: SO, GALING KA RIN PALA SA ALL GIRLS SCHOOL!!!!









* there was a guy who's been courting me.. and i told him i didnt like him in short i turned him dwn... one time he was calling my fone and texting me ten msgs in a row... saying "pag di mo ko kinausap magpapakamatay ako" still i ignore his calls and msgs... and i fell asleep... morning after he's still texting me and calling me... and i send him this message...

" oh bakit buhay ka pa? kala ko ba pag di ko sinagot calls mo papakamatay ka na? bkit di ka pa rin patay?









* pambasted para sa mga makukilit manligaw

"how many times do i have to flush before you go away?"










* pwede etong isagot sa mga manliligaw na korniks ang style:

"i'm funny. you're funny looking. so, we have something in common.
but i still don't like you. so go awaaaay!!!"








* a friend brought over his new boyfriend for the barkada to meet..

after several hours, the guy excused himself.

friend: so guys, how is he? feedback!
barkada: he's ok. pero friend, KM sya.

we all agreed.
KM translation: KUTIS MAHIRAP









*Last Friday,medyo pagod at gutom ako after my job.
Nasa trainstation ako para umuwi na.Habang naghihintay ako ng tram,napansin ko may lalaking laging tingin-ng-tingin sa akin,mukha pang nagpapacharming.Hindi pa nagkasya at lumapit sa akin at heto ang conversation namin.

Guy:Miss mukha yatang walang darating na tram ah!

Nene (gutom at pagod)I'm sure na darating ang train,hayan at nakalatag ng riles!!(sabay irap)





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