Good Comebacks

For someone who thinks he is the smartest person to walk the earth and has decided to take it upon himself to explain a very simple thing in a very complicated manner:  

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.    






For a chatterbox

Keep talking, one day you might say something smart















To someone who states something that is very painfully obvious:  

Thank God you're here, Captain Obvious!!!









 Say this to someone who has just said something very amusingly senile to you :  

You’re the reason no one wants human cloning.








 To that annoying person in the office who thinks he knows everything about everything:  

I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap









To someone who has just disagreed with you about something very trivial:  

You!... Off my planet!








 To someone who seems surprised when you say something intelligent:  

I'm not as dumb as you look








 For a girl who has been going on and on:  

I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.








To a girl who thinks she has engaged you in a riveting conversation and asks you a question about it:  

You obviously overestimated my interest







 To someone who's been trying to get your attention and finally exclaims that you were being rude for not noticing:

I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.









 To someone who has the magic ability to come up with really senseless solutions to problems:

Did you go to school to be an idiot or were you just born that way?








To someone who has just said something very shallow:

I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.









 Comeback to the one insulting you

"How does it feel to insult other people just because you want to hide your imperfections?"    







When someone says something exceptionally stupid:

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

 
 

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