Good Comebacks

For someone who thinks he is the smartest person to walk the earth and has decided to take it upon himself to explain a very simple thing in a very complicated manner:  

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.     Evil or Very MadEvil or Very Mad






For a chatterbox

Keep talking, one day you might say something smart


011011












To someone who states something that is very painfully obvious:  

Thank God you're here, Captain Obvious!!!

dft012







 Say this to someone who has just said something very amusingly senile to you :  

You’re the reason no one wants human cloning.








 To that annoying person in the office who thinks he knows everything about everything:  

I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap









To someone who has just disagreed with you about something very trivial:  

You!... Off my planet!








 To someone who seems surprised when you say something intelligent:  

I'm not as dumb as you look

Mr. GreenMr. Green






 For a girl who has been going on and on:  

I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.








To a girl who thinks she has engaged you in a riveting conversation and asks you a question about it:  

You obviously overestimated my interest







 To someone who's been trying to get your attention and finally exclaims that you were being rude for not noticing:

I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.









 To someone who has the magic ability to come up with really senseless solutions to problems:

Did you go to school to be an idiot or were you just born that way?

rolling on the floorrolling on the floor






To someone who has just said something very shallow:

I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.









 Comeback to the one insulting you

"How does it feel to insult other people just because you want to hide your imperfections?"     em2_5







When someone says something exceptionally stupid:

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

 cursingcursing
 

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